The right time to have sex is when you’ve chosen your contraception and you feel it’s something that you both want. You’ve talked through what you might be worried about and you know how you are both going to handle it afterwards.
If you’ve got doubts you probably need to think about it a bit longer. There’s no rush. Waiting until you’re relaxed and confident about your decision to have sex means you’re more likely to enjoy it and less likely to regret it, (many people who have sex under 16 regret it later).
If you’re sure that you’re doing it for the right reasons, make sure you’re doing it with the right person.
- Can you trust them?
- Do they make you feel relaxed and happy?
- Can you have a laugh with them?
Trust and friendship are great starting points for great sex. But don’t expect miracles! It’s only natural to feel nervous your first time. And no-one’s going to win medals for how good you are at sex. So don’t put pressure on yourself to get it right immediately. Just try to relax and go with your own feelings – good sex happens when you feel comfortable enough to talk to someone about even the most embarrassing things. That sort of trust doesn’t happen overnight. Face the fact that sex is going to feel strange, awkward – it might even be funny at first. But it will get better. All it takes is practice with the right person.
Most importantly, if you are going to have sex then always use a condom – unwanted pregnancy or an STI are souvenirs you could well do without.